Marriage is a decision every couple makes some time. To make such an important decision they must be familiar with every aspect of a partner (including sex, since it is one of the most important thing for consideration) thus lessen the probability of divorcing in the future.

Premarital Sex - Positives and Negatives
"Is it ok to have premarital sex?" That is a common question among teens and engaged couples. Perhaps you are in a relationship that is progressing in that direction, but you're not sure what to do. In your mind, you are probably weighing the pros and cons of premarital sex. On the positive side of the scale, there is acceptance from your peers, hope for pleasure, and the fulfillment of sexual desires. The negative side of the scale carries the weights of morals, fear of pregnancy or disease, and guilt. How do these scales balance? What is the right decision? Let's take a look at some of the facts.

Premarital Sex - Is it Moral?
Morality is a factor for many people when deciding whether or not to have premarital sex. Is it a factor for you? After all, the messages we receive from most TV shows and movies these days tells us "everyone is doing it." In light of today's permissive attitude, your peers may think you're weird to even question it.

But maybe there is something inside you, like a voice in your head, that is making you uncertain about whether or not sex before marriage is a right or wrong action. Many people refer to this voice as their conscience. How can you know if your "conscience" is right? People all around the world look to the Bible as a moral or religious book, so let's see what it says about premarital sex.

The Bible refers to premarital sex as fornication. That's a word we don't hear much these days, so what does it mean? Fornication is sexual intercourse between people who are not married to each other. The only distinction the Bible makes between premarital sex and adultery is that adultery involves married persons while fornication involves those who are unmarried. Premarital sex is just as much of a sin as adultery and all other forms of sexual immorality. They all involve having sexual relations with someone you are not married to.

The Bible explains, "…The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body" (1 Corinthians 6:13). Verse 18 of this chapter goes on to say, "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body." Galatians 5:19 speaks the same, "The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity…" Ephesians 5:3 says it most plainly, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." From these verses, we see that the Bible promotes complete and total abstinence from premarital sex.

Premarital Sex - Is it Safe Physically and Emotionally?
Another consideration when deciding about premarital sex is safety. Did you know that 50% of the people who currently have HIV are between the ages of 15 and 24?1 Using a condom only reduces the risk of contracting HIV by 85%. Condoms do not significantly reduce the risk of contracting other sexually transmitted diseases.2 Take these statistics into consideration when making your decision.

Most people don't consider the emotional effects of premarital sex. You see, sex is an emotional experience and it affects our lives in ways we don't understand. After engaging in premarital sex, many people express feelings of guilt, embarrassment, distrust, resentment, lack of respect, tension, and so much more. As you read the next section, consider God's love for you as a primary reason for sexual purity. God does not want you to experience unnecessary emotional pain!

Premarital Sex - Recreation or Re-creation?
In discussing premarital sex, we often focus on the "recreation" aspect of it. Yes, sex is pleasurable. God, our Creator, designed it that way. It may be hard to think of God creating sex, but He did! In God's plan, sex was designed for married couples to enjoy the pleasure and excitement of sexual relations. The Bible talks about this in Hebrews 13:4, "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral." God created sex to be fun, exciting, and pleasurable. At the same time, though, it is clear in the Bible that God restricts sexual activity to married couples.

Why is this? Yes, sex is pleasurable, but in God's view, the primary purpose of sex is not recreation, but rather re-creation. In other words, sex is for reproduction. God does not limit sex to married couples to rob pleasure from those who are unmarried. Rather, God commands against premarital sex in order to protect unmarried people from unwanted pregnancies, from children born to parents who do not want them, and to protect children from parents who are not prepared for them. Imagine, for a moment, a world without premarital sex. There would be no sexually-transmitted diseases, there would be no un-wed mothers, there would be no unwanted pregnancies, there would be no abortions, etc. According to the Bible, abstinence is God's only policy when it comes to premarital sex. Abstinence saves lives, protects babies, gives sexual relations the proper value, and most importantly abstinence honors God.


Premarital Sex - Conclusion
Premarital sex has no moral grounds, it is against God, and it is unsafe physically and emotionally. Although sex is pleasurable, it is designed by God to be enjoyed by two married people.

Premarital Sex - Where Should We Draw the Line?
A frequent question in relation to premarital sex is, "If we can't have sex, how far can we go?" A better question would be "How far should we go?" God's Word does not give us a detailed "list" of things a couple should or shouldn't do before they are married. Some use this as an excuse to "push the envelope" as close to premarital sex as possible. However, just because the Bible does not directly address what a couple should or shouldn't do, that does not give us license to do everything up to the borderline of premarital sex. By essence, "foreplay" is designed to be "before sex" and to get a couple ready for sex. Logically then, all forms of "foreplay" should be restricted to couples who are married. Anything that could be considered "foreplay" should be avoided until marriage.

So, if sexual activity and all forms of foreplay should be restricted to married couples, what can a pre-married couple do? This is to some degree up to the couple and their own relationship with God. It is generally recommended that a couple not go past holding hands, hugging, and light kissing before marriage. The more a married couple has to share exclusively between themselves, the more special and unique the sexual relationship becomes.

Premarital Sex - What If It is Already Too Late?
If you have already engaged in premarital sex, you should make a commitment with God, your boyfriend/girlfriend, and yourself to remain sexually pure from this point on until marriage. Ask God for help and strength to remain sexually pure until marriage. God will provide the strength (Philippians 4:13) and grace to overcome the temptation to have sex, as long as you are willing and careful not to put yourself in a place of temptation. Remember the Lord's Prayer: "Lead us not into temptation?" That does not mean He will deliver us from the consequences of our own bad choices. If you fall to temptation, it is not because God led you there.

1 Corinthians 10:13 declares, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." It is possible to fight temptation.

Also, it is important to remember that God can and does forgive the sin of premarital sex. When a person places his or her faith in the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation, desiring to turn away from the old life of sin, all sins are forgiven. That includes past, present, and future, big and small. Jesus died to pay the penalty for all of our sins, including premarital sex. Once they are forgiven, they are all forgiven. Colossians 1:13-14 says, "For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." What we are to do is confess our sins. 1 John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."

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Consider this, is driving a car wrong? No. Is driving a car for an 13-year-old wrong? Yes. It's fun and exciting for the 13-year-old, but it puts his life and other lives in jeopardy.

Is sex, which is fun, between a husband and wife wrong? No. Is sex wrong if it's with someone else's spouse? Yes. It may be fun and exciting, but it often brings tremendous heartache to that person's spouse and the children involved.

We like to determine what is right and wrong, according to what we want. That's human nature. If we want to have sex with someone, we want to set our own standards. Often our standards are, if they're not married, then ok. But what if the other person is put at risk for a sexually transmitted disease? Now it gets fuzzy. What if the person is put at risk for pregnancy and faces the difficult decision of abortion? Fuzzy also. What if the person is a relative? What if the person is the same sex? What if it's sex for payment? What if it's sex for pornography? What if it involves children?

What's fun and exciting to one person may be viewed as very wrong by someone else. Is it? Where does a person determine what is right and wrong?

A loving God has made his wisdom on life known to us. He says that sin is pleasurable for the moment. There probably isn't any sin which is not at the moment pleasurable. But pleasure can't be our only standard for making decisions. Think how fun it would have been to really severely smack a younger brother or sister at times. Pleasurable for the moment, but fortunately we hold back because pleasure isn't our only guide.

God wants to keep us from horrendous problems which we can bring on ourselves by the stupid decisions we make. He genuinely loves us and wants to protect us from decisions and behavior that will ruin our lives or someone else's life.

Why does God (who created sex) restrict sex to marriage? Is it to spoil people's fun or to insure that a couple enjoys the deepest level of intimacy possible, reserved for only each other? When God gives us guidance his motives are pure and prompted by his love for us.

People get used sexually for momentary fun and excitement, but what if there is something more valuable than momentary pleasure? Like dignity, self-esteem, knowing that you're also treating that other person with greater value? Perhaps God thinks relationships can be more intimate, secure and stronger if they are built on something more substantial than sexual involvement. Whatever God's reasons, his wisdom surpasses ours and he can be trusted. And quite often we later see the value of following him.

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sex is a natural phenomenon and it can happens naturally when it has to happen it doesnt matter if it happens before or after marriage. the only thing that matters is how much is your partner attracted to you and how strong is your relationship. you shouldn't have sex if you are willing to accept the consequence/responsibility for it -- doesn't matter if you're married or not.

yes premarital sex is unthinkable in India

Right or wrong, heh.

Like all things "right/wrong", you can look at it different ways. Religion has never been a strong contender in philosophy for providing moral guidance, as there are no good answers to:

"Is it good because god commands it, or does god command it because it's good?"

If one says the prior, then whatever god commands is defined as good, and the word "good" has lost all meaning. If the latter, then one admits that there is some other source for knowing what is good or not, that god adheres to (ie, admitting that god is not the defining point for what is good).

So where does one find out what is right or wrong? Well, pick up a book on moral philosophy and you'll soon realise that there are no straight answers to it. Utilitarianism seems like a nice approach if not followed too rigidly, but it requires a fair bit of thinking and might not suite the impulsive one who wants to have firm rules to adhere to with little thought required.

Everything got z right time....
Should wait!!! it gets finally more exciting!!:-)lol.. kidding.
But it depends on the couple only.....zey may be considering it right..or wrong!

there is no right or wrong....there is just perspective and opinion.....my opinion is there r much more relevant topics than sex to discuss ... sex is good as long as it is safe.... use protection and enjoy.